Of Job hunts and Interviews

There is one thing which is almost inevitable in the life of a software engineer : Switching companies. The reason for a job shift could be as simple as a need for change in work, as materalistic as a hefty pay package offered by some other company or as serious as an issue with the manager . All you need, is a reason, to quit one company and join another.

Being on jobhunt, especially when its for your first job, is one of the most bothersome situation you can face in life . I remember the days when I was on the hunt for my first job off-campus. Gosh, it was pretty tiring. I came across different kinds of people while I was on the search for jobs.

Tech Interviewers:
The first set of people are the tech interviewers. Basically there are two clans of tech interviewers. All the other kinds of interviewers are a mix and match of these two clans.


The first kind are those who are "I am here to help you" kind. These bunch of interviewers try to help the interviewee perform his best in the interview. They make him comfortable initially and increase the complexity of the questions gradually. The interviewee also feels comfortable once he gains some confidence answering the easier questions first. You are lucky if your interviewer belongs to this category. However, its obvious that these kind of interviewers are pretty rare.

The second kind are those who are "Do you really know anything at all?" kind. These interviewers just have fun making the interviewee feel that he is fit for nothing. If you mention on your resume that your area of interest is databases then they tend to ask you questions on networks. You will experience hell if your interviewer belongs to this category. They either give a satirical smile to whatever you say or remain expressionless throughout the interview making you think twice before whatever you say. No matter what you do, 'Mogambo khush nahin hoga.'

I had an experience with this kind of interviewer at ADP, around 2 years ago. The guy who interviewed me, I guess had already made a decision that I am not going to join ADP at any cost. He asked me a lot of general questions but no matter whatever I replied, he had a contradicting view on that. I thought he was taking some kind of a stress interview and tried to keep my cool but in the end even that didnt work out. My resume was put on hold and I never got an offer from ADP.

HR department :
The next set of people are my favourites. They belong to the most powerful department called the HR.

I like the HR department becoz they can stab you in the front and still can explain with a most delightful expression on their face, what a pleasure it was to have you stabbed in their office premises. I had a great experience with an HR of a reputed company. I attended the technical interview in that company and everything went fine. I was pretty confident about getting an offer from that company. But due to some problems at the managerial level, that post had been offered to some experienced guy. I approached the HR eager to know the result of my interview. She came out from her cabin and told me that the offer couldnt be made to me due to some reasons. The whole scene reminded me of a typical doctor of a bollywood movie coming out from an operation theatre and say "I am sorry, hum ne poori koshish kee hain, magar .... bacha nahin paaye".

Even more hilarious would be the mail sent by them informing you that you havent been selected. It goes something like this.

========================================================================
Hi Vikram Kumar,

After carefully reviewing your experience and qualifications, we have determined that we do not have a position available which is a strong match at this time..(read as you are not fit for a job in our company). Hope you might consider us again in the future.(You will never get a job here, better stop trying for this company). All the best for your future endeavours. ( Try to find a company where there are more useless people than you).

Thanks again for considering XXX Technologies. ( You should feel awful for wasting our time)

Regards,
XYZ
(HR Manager)
========================================================================


But things would be a bit different while attending an interview for the sake of a job shift. The technical interviews wouldnt be a problem at this stage bcoz you already have some experience behind you. Dealing with the HRs would be a challenge at this stage. All your soft skills need to be honed. How good a pay package you get depends on how well you deal with the HR.

The negotiation would be the most interesting part of the enterprise. I have recently had an experience with the HR of a certain company and the whole negotiation part was analgous to the bargaining in the Kothi market. You will become a vendor trying to sell yourself and the HR guy would be your buyer.

HR : Whats your expected CTC? --> 'Kitne mein aayega?'

Me : 6.5 lac per annum --> '6.5 laakh'

HR : Is it negotiable ? ----> 'Aane ka daam batao? ' as in 'dene ka daam batao'

Me : Yeah but I have some minimum expectations. --> ' Aap kitne mein ho'

Then the HR placed an offer of 5.25 lac per annum. I thought : Is he kidding? 6.5 to 5.25, then I make a reality check, 5.25 is not too bad either, however my ego wouldnt let me accept the offer for 5.25. Then the proceedings will go as follows:

Me : 5.25 is a bit too low. I was really interested in your company's work but your package is making me reconsider my decision. --> 'Na aap ki baat, na meri baat…chalo 5.75 pe fix kar lein…'

HR thinks for a while and says 'I spoke to your concerned manager and he agreed upon 5.5, thats the best we can offer' --> '5.5 ko aana hoto aao, usse jyaada to main nahin doonga' and if it were really a market the HR would have made an act of leaving the stall . Then I would have acted as a typical vendor and said 'ok aa jao 5.5 ko accept kartaa hoon'.

Probably, I have exaggerated the scene a bit, but more or less the things I have said are not far from reality. Interviews, though, are a pain in the ass while you are attending them, make for good and sometimes funny memories once you are done with them.